FCKN German Words

Here’s a great German word for you: Klugscheißer. If you were to translate this gem literally into English, you’d end up with something like clever-pooper. And what is a clever pooper? Somebody who’s so incredibly clever, they’ll ruin any fun conversation by explaining that actually if you were to be exact and truly literal, it would be clever-shitter.‍

Now I know what you’re thinking. And yes. People have called me this. 

As you can tell, Klugscheißer is one of those German expressions where you just take whichever words you can think of and stick them together - and TADAA, you’ve created a brand new term with a very precise meaning.

All your other favourite German words are made like this: Schadenfreude (harm-happiness), Wanderlust (hiking-desire) and Fernweh (distance-ake). 

The amazing thing is that in your aspiration to create a brand new expression you’re not limited to merely two short words. No no no. You can take as many words of whatever length you desire and combine them as you please.

This usually leaves you with verbal (or rather nominal if you were to be precise) monstrosities like:

Straßenverkehrsordnung. Kommunikationswissenschaften. Datenschutzgrundverordnung.

Germans sometimes play a game where they try to come up with the most stupid long word they can think of. It commonly goes something like this:

Donaudampfschiffahrts (...) gesellschaftskapitänsmützenzipfel...

This could go on forever. Literally. (Literally in the true and correct sense of the word).

Now here’s the issue:

These words don’t fit onto mobile screens.

When you have a website and you want people to be able to use it on their phones without any issues, the German language poses some special challenges. Take it from your favourite Klugscheißer: In these cases you have to make some headings smaller than others so the site works properly across all devices. 

And it just so happens that I can help you out with this. So let me know if you need me.